Both feet on the ground

I've got like 1 1/2 hours of down time and I just don't know what to do with myself. I never have down time. So why not think good thoughts...let's see. Oh yes, its coming upon the Thanksgiving season quite quickly so in such a spirit I am grateful for...

I'm grateful for peace and joy

I'm grateful for my somewhat new apartment (I've named her Serene) and my new job

I'm grateful for the amazing relationships God has formed in my life and also for those that He has kept even through fire

Thought of the day

Why do we commit good acts for the purpose of hoping others will see? What we do, we do not do for man, but we do for God. He is the rewarder.

A Prayer For Rest

I don't know about you, but over the past 5 years, I've been grinding like there is no tomorrow. I've flown through an undergraduate and graduate program, only to prepare to do it again. I've been working 50-60 hours per week, and on top of that I've been trying to keep up with having some sort of life outside of the mundane obligations of my academic centered life.

We all want to achieve some level of success in our lives. The definition of success of course is different depending on who you ask. Some people consider success as getting married and having children. Some people considered a number of degrees and a 6 figure salary success. Other consider being able to get up in the morning without dreading going to work success. And as born and bred Americans, we've been taught that you do what is necessary to reach that goal. Grind until you can't, then grind some more.

I wonder what would happen if we took ourselves less seriously. I wonder how our lives would change if we realized that the standards we have set for ourselves are strictly self imposed. Did God ever say that you must get your Ph.D.? Did God ever say that you need to own your own home by age 23? All He said was live holy and obey Him. We must have added that extra stuff somewhere along the lines, and now we spend the majority of our time living up to our own standards instead of those that are Gods.

I wonder what would happen if we learned how to sit down and rest.

Father
I pray that you would show your children how to rest
How to be able to step away from things, obligations, and people
And allow time for You to refill us
Revive us Lord
Teach us to set apart time to receive from You
Father You said that in our weakness You are strong
Your children are weary and weak
Stand up and be strong in us Lord
Fill us with Your spirit so we can fulfill what You've called us to do
And give us the wisdom to make the rest secondary to our own health and wellness
Help us to learn how to say no
Help us to learn how to discern if You are calling us to a thing
Our desire is to please You
Help us to realize that having degrees and money is not what pleases You
But it is attending to those You've called us to
Those in distress, the widows, and the orphans
Help us correctly order our priorities so we do not give into stress and frustration
We know that you've freed us from the pressures of this world
We no longer have to pay penance for our short comings to any man
Because Jesus, You are our justification
You have already freed us from the standards set by man
And You now hold us to a standard of love
We give You our worries and concerns
We give You those things that trouble our mind and our bodies
Take them away Lord, and revive us
Show us grace and mercy as we learn our new order of priorities
Be patient with us and don't remove from us Your grace
Because we know that it is by Your hand are we able to do anything

Amen

Soooo I got a new phone the other day, and I really really like it. One downside though. It turns out that many of my numbers weren't saved on the SIM in my old blackberry, soooo I lost a lot of numbers, which is cool. If we talk often enough for me to have your number, you'll call. If not...lol

Alright, so there is it. The Moto Charm. I was hesitant about getting another phone because #1. I loves me blackberry. and #2. I don't want a phone that will be a distraction. You know...like when you should be driving you're playing Guitar Hero or something. Well, I was right. This phone has way too many distractions, applications, games, whatever.

But hey, I'm a business woman now right? Full time gig. I set my own hours. I schedule my own clients. I need a grown up phone...with games, including Snake and NES Aladdin.

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Psalm 127:1

"Except the Lord build this house you labor in vain"

I love this scripture, mostly because it tells me that my independence is useless. Unless I allow the Lord to have free reign and make the decisions in my life, all of my accomplishments, earnings, and possessions are pointless. My work would have been in vain. My hours of studying and working. My efforts of patching up friendships and being less than honest to spare the feelings of others. All of my efforts that I thought were in my best interest and even in the interest of others...in vain.

So here I am trying to let to Lord have His way. I don't want to take the reigns. I don't want to have control. I don't want to be independent of Him. Because if I do, if I have, and if I am, everything I do is in vain.

Lord have your way, build this house

Undeserving

Sometimes I think too much about too little and get lost in thoughts that seems to drag on but never reach their conclusion.

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I am undeserving of everything that I have
I have not earned a thing
Even on my best day, my righteousness is nothing
There isn't anything I've ever done to earn
His grace
His love
His forgiveness
His salvation
His life
His hand
His face
The moment God breathed life into my lifeless body
The moment God saved my unworthy soul
The moments God rescued me from self destruction
All of these things are gifts

Who am I to judge another? Who am I to tell someone else in anything but love that they are on the wrong path? No one. And who are you?

We have got to learn how to walk in love. Stop looking at people as if your thoughts and feelings toward them affect anything. We have to learn that instead of hurting one another with our words, our side glances, and our cold hearts, we have got to reach out in the love of Christ. This was God's gift to us. How selfish and cruel to hold it captive from another. Don't you know that this is why we are all here? Not to reach the status quo. Not to achieve our dreams. But to show the love of Christ even when it hurts. And most of the time it does hurt. It should. But this is our burden and our cross. Jesus took everything else.

Give the love of Christ to everyone you meet. It was given to you.

Colossians 2:1-3

The Contentment of Mediocrity

Just a super random thought:

It's so much easier to be content with where you are than to strive to go higher (financially, spiritually, emotionally, etc). I mean, there is so much risk is attempting to better yourself. You risk alienation from your peer group. You risk immersion into an environment with which you are unfamiliar. You risk loosing the status or foothold that you once occupied as a result of giving it up in an effort to move on to something else. Afterall, an old life will not always wait for you while you try out a new one. And of course you risk failing, and falling flat on your face which results in lots of things such as self rejection and public humiliation.

Maybe its just better to stay where you are. Don't risk it. Afterall, you're not starving. You're not that unhappy. You've got some sort of income. Why take a chance and jump if you're only likely to end up worse off than when you started?

What's my take?

I'd rather end up flat broke, depressed, and lonely at the bottom after falling on my face in attempt to climb to an unattainable plateau than to stay in a world full of contentment with mediocrity.

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In other news, vacation spotlight (I'm currently saving up for this one):

Palma Mallorca, Spain

Now I don't speak a lick of spanish. I mean, I probably know 10 words total, including numbers 1 through 5. But this is a vacation spot for many of my family members and all I've heard are good things. I think that sitting on the beach and looking into the dazzling clarity of unoccupied waters appeals to me. I've got God, my dear cousin (who is now a citizen of Spain), and some of the best beaches in the world.